The last night

The Last Night


The Normandy slowly glided through the celestial ether like a shark on the hunt, headed for a mass relay, the estuaries of the sea of stars. The lights were dimmed and some were off altogether as well as several nonessential systems to try and conserve power in case they needed it against the inhuman enemy they were bound to face. Tanya Shepard sat in the empty, dim mess hall teeming with lonely company. Tanya was an average woman in her late twenties. She had medium length, raven black hair that fell in several tresses about her head. A pair of astute, sapphire blue eyes peered out to take in the world around her. Her mouth, a little bit wider then a standard female mouth, was home to a commanding voice and an authoritative tone but also to a warm and empathetic manner of speech and a helpful, nurturing dialect. Her nose was the one part of her face that was different from the rest of her. It lacked a tip to it, an old war wound from the Skyillian Blitz. A Bartarian got a lucky throw with a grenade and flying metal did the rest. The bridge of her nose looked as though it curled back in on itself and was a sore point for Shepard. Luckily it almost never came up in conversation. She stood at just under six foot and was an average thirty six C and although Cerberus had healed most of her old war scars she had several new ones dotted about her person. Reminders that she wasn't wholly human lest she forget. Her mind was keen and sharp and her decisions quick and decisive, a match for any man. She had been brought up surrounded by the Systems alliance and their dogma. She had attended various different schools on the many ship's her parents were stationed on, but it was when she was sixteen that she was then transferred to the Jon Grissom academy when she showed signs of using biotic's. It started when a meteor shower hit one of the ships Tanya was attending school on, she panicked and put up a protective barrier. Her biotic's had come on rather suddenly but what baffled doctors was why she didn't show any aptitude until the middle of her adolescent years but what also puzzled them was her emerald green eyes had turned to a sapphire blue, the same colour as eezo. From then on she trained to harness the new power she had acquired, always told by her mother, Hannah, that her powers were not to be used for ill and only for the betterment of others. It was thanks to this guiding arm and the discipline of the academy that Tanya grew up not only with a respect for he powers but respect for others who weren't as lucky as she was.
A scant few moments ago she had ordered Joker, the aeronaut of the Normandy, to set as course for the Omega-4 Relay, knowing full well this could be a one way trip. As she made her way back down to the holomap in the CIC, she passed the consoles in the command walkway and noticed all the orange displays without eyes to read them. It then hit her just what faced her and the team she had assembled and for the first time she felt the weight of  responsibility that she had been burdened with. Not only the colonists but also her crew. She had vowed to be empathetic without letting personal feelings haze her judgement. But now her crew was in the clutches of the enemy and now the boundaries she had drawn up, which had been clear at mission start were now starting to blur and she found it hard to stay focused and think logically. So she took the lift down to the crew deck and sat in the empty mess to calm herself down and prepare for what could be a one way trip.
Shepard ran a hand through her hair as she returned her stare into the murky purple liquid in front of her. Shepard had made herself a Purple Andromeda from the supplies she had found in the kitchen. A Purple Andromeda was a popular drink among service men and spaceport crews that simulated the taste and flavour of alcohol without impairing eyesight or motor skills. It was created in the Andromeda bar on the citadel, a popular hangout for service men and women as well as civilians and local law enforcement. As most of the patrons jobs involved them being armed, they were usually on their lunch break or about to clock on so the barman made a drink using Herf's Water and Klaxon Red. The result was the Waters alcohol like taste with the Klaxons texture and bite. Shepard had drunk it many times before and she had acquired a taste for it. She cat a quick look over to the empty galley, expecting to see Gardner wave back as he leant on the counter. She returned to her drink as the door to the gunnery bay parted and opened and the tall, sweeping figure of Garrus Vakarian strode majestically out from the forward battery and into the abandoned crew quarters.
Garrus idly tapped at the console keyboard as he set about reading the diagnostics he ran on the targeting computer and firing systems. All files had been scrubbed of the virus as EDI had said but he wanted to make sure himself. The last thing they needed was for the weapons to seize up at a critical moment. He stood up and cast an eye over the Thanix cannon that he had installed as the main gun battery. His mandibles rode up his mouth ever so slightly in the way of a turian smile. If those Collectors tried the same trick that they used when they destroyed the first Normandy then they were in for a big surprise. The Thanix cannon wasn't a replication of Collector tech but it was damn close and that was good enough for those on board. Feeling a bit better about their odds of survival, Garrus decided that now would be the best time to put all what he had learned into practice. All he needed to do was finish a few things up on Shepards end then they could begin. He had been so busy with calibrating the guns, doing various missions and seeing Doctor Chakwas about his injuries he sustained on Omega that what scant time he had available to himself he had dedicated to research. He had gone on the Extranet expecting some diagrams and maybe some medical papers but instead he was confronted with a wealth of knowledge that would've let him learn everything about humans but instead chose a few sites that seemed promising. They had helped out somewhat although they all recommended watching some vids that showed examples of the different rituals that humans engaged in but Garrus decided to give them a miss as personal time was so short. He felt confident that he had learned enough to make the Commander feel comfortable and that he didn't mean any offence. He left the battery wanting to check that the wine he bought on Illium was still in the galley cabinet and hadn't been drunk. The door hissed open and as he stepped past the threshold, he spotted Shepard looking forlornly into a cup of purple liquid. Just then his mind went into over drive. He could talk with Shepard about the final arrangements as they had less then a few hours left until they hit the Omega Four relay. He slowly made his way between the sleep pods and toward the table that Shepard was parked at. She didn't notice him until he was right next to her.
Shepard looked up at him, a smile crossed her face as she saw him. Having Garrus next to her made her feel a little more at ease. That things weren't as bad as they seemed.
"Hey Commander." Garrus greeted.
"Garrus."
"You look a little dejected." Garrus commented.
"I won't lie Garrus. I'm starting to feel a bit apprehensive about this whole mission."
"The feelings mutual Shepard but it won't interfere with me doing the mission at all."
Shepard just sighed as she returned he gaze to her drink and downing another swig from her drink. Garrus swallowed and thought he would nudge the Commander closer to the question.
"So I guess it's time to book the room huh?" Shepard questioned.
Garrus was caught off guard by the frankness of her question and stunned by her blasé approach to it. In truth, Shepard had been looking forward to it but as time to herself and to Garrus.
"Err, yes I guess so." Garrus answered as he came to his senses.
"That's good. Leave it for a few minutes then come up. I'll have a shower in the mean time while you get things ready."
Tanya then stood up, leaving her liquid comforter behind before making her way toward the lift, partway there she stopped and turned to look over her shoulder at her dear friend.
"Thanks for this Garrus." She uttered before continuing on her way.
Garrus stood there, watching Shepard go before she turned around and thanked him. After she had disappeared he wondered how quickly they had gotten around to the subject of blowing off steam but that was pushed aside by another, more urgent, matter. He had to get things ready before Shepard finished her shower otherwise the whole evening would be ruined. He quickly retrieved his wine from the fridge and made his way back to the gun battery to get changed. He had to look the part and he had just the outfit in mind.
Garrus admired himself in the mirror in the male washroom. He hoped the blue and green made him look a bit more lean and made his chest look wider and his collar taller. Turian women liked that and he was certain that human women did as well. Leaving the bathroom he wandered to the lift, nodding to Thane as he passed by. He clutched the wine bottle in his hand, afraid that if he put it down he would forget it. The door opened with a metallic chorus announcing his arrival. He walked into the metal box and was about to press the button that lead to The Loft when he froze. He was starting to have serious doubts about this whole meeting. Maybe it would be better if he called the whole thing off and save Shepard from embarrassment and him from ridicule. But then all his research would've gone to waste and Shepard was expecting this. Well, as the Commander said, "Your damned if you do and your damned if you don't." With renewed exuberance, he punched the button before his conscience could mount a counter attack. The doors closed and he started upwards, toward his destiny.
The faint sound of trickling water greeted Garrus' ears as he stepped out of the lift. He started toward the door and pressed a button on the holographic display to open it. Once the door was closed he took in his surroundings. The small little study area off to the right and the double fish tanks flanking on the left which lead to a small flight of steps to the bedroom cum seating area. The cabin was compact but in a cosy sort of way. On the pillar near the model ship display case he noticed a small orange display and found it to be a sound system, not unlike the one he had back on the citadel or in his Omega base. He quickly transferred the song he had on his visor to the temporary memory of the sound system. Now all was set and all he had to do was wait for Shepard to appear. Bringing up his Omni tool, he quickly reviewed his notes, checking them off his list mentally. Then, the water stopped and his pulse quickened. Now was the moment he had been waiting for.
Shepard enjoyed the last few trickles of water before wandering to the other side of the bathroom to activate the dryer. As the warm air played over her body she idly began thinking about her and Garrus. True she did have a soft spot for him but was it really right to do this to him? She wasn't his species and she didn't want to hurt Garrus anymore then he already was. But that was one of the reasons she was doing this. She wanted to soothe his pain and give him something to believe in, but also as she felt comfortable around him. He made her feel confident and motivated. Here she was on a strange craft with strange people with only a few trusted friends and then Garrus showed up. Her unofficial aide de camp on missions and her best friend on down time. So in regards this was right. The pro's outweighed the cons and if it did go pear shaped then there would be no bad feelings between them. She started to pull on the standard ship fatigues that all the crew wore as her mind drifted to what the next few hours would hold.
The bathroom door slid open and Garrus suddenly tensed up awaiting the appearance of Shepard. He didn't have to wait long as the commander walked nonchalantly out of the bathroom and into the small study area. She was just fixing some hair behind her ear when she looked up and noticed Garrus just standing there. The turian swallowed as a smile crept across Shepards' face.
"Hey, I brought wine. Best I could afford on a vigilantes salary."
Shepard just crossed her arms. From what he had told her she knew how much a vigilantes salary paid but she wasn't going to spoil it for him. He was trying, she could see that, and the fact he had brought wine showed her he did research even if it was a little clichéd. As he moved to the pillar Shepard guessed that he had music planned as well. Pressing a few buttons the opening stains of Boom, Boom, Bang filled the cabin. Garrus quickly spun round to gauge Shepards reaction to the music he had chosen. She had smiled when he told her he had brought wine and he took that as a good sign, quickly turning on the music to set the atmosphere. Tanya though couldn't believe how hackneyed it all was as she shook her head. Music, wine and no doubt he had a series of one liners to try out or compliments but she might as well go along with it. She sauntered over to him and stood facing him.
"If you were a Turian I'd be complimenting your waist or your fringe so your um, hair looks good and your waist is….very supportive."
Shepard's smile grew and she had to stop her self from laughing out loud at how right she had been. Garrus shifted from side to side. All this was new territory for him and not only that it was with an alien as well. He suddenly felt that what he had said had been out of line. Human females were sensitive about their figure it seemed.
"Hopefully that's not offensive in human cul-" He had made to apologise but Shepard raised her hand. She needed to stop him before he dug himself a hole that he couldn't get out of.
"Woah, consider me seduced smooth talker. Now shut up and stop worrying." Garrus hadn't even reached first base yet and he was in danger of fouling it up if he kept on. She wanted to save him from yet one more thing that he could add to his list of failures. She turned off the music hoping for Garrus to drop the façade he was using and be open and honest without having to hide behind manners, fake decorum and worry.
"I,I just…" Garrus was at a loss. He decided that he might as well be honest. That was the only thing that came to him at that moment.
"I've seen so many things go wrong Shepard. My work with C-sec, what happened with Sidonis."
Shepard's face softened as Garrus finally let down his stoic demeanour to show her something she had never seen in him before. Vulnerability. As he talked she walked up to him. He had long been her shield, always watching her back, never complaining if something went awry or if better decisions could be made, but now she wanted to be his shield. To help this restless soul before her find peace and meaning in the lonely interstellar void that had forsaken him.
Garrus had let his defences down and let Shepard catch a glimpse of himself. Not as Garrus Vakarian, Turian, soldier, former C-sec, vigilante and a member of the team that took down Saren. But as Garrus Vakarian, the person. The man behind the training and the funny quips. The silence was only brief.
"I just want something to go right. Just once, just…" Garrus stopped when he felt Shepards' hand gently stroke his bandaged scars, her fingers gently following the hidden contours of his face and the cybernetics covered by the bandage that shrouded his face. In the back of his mind he was wary of the fact that his scars might put Tanya off but this told him otherwise. He suddenly felt meaning in her touch. An unspoken truth. Shepard didn't care what he looked like, she liked the turian that was standing in front of her. The friend who always had her back and was always there when she needed someone. Shepard slowly lowered her head as did Garrus, their foreheads touching. Shepard had also done her research as well and she felt more comfortable to show affection to Garrus in the way he was accustomed to. All at once, Garrus' nerves disappeared to be replaced with a calming sensation. Garrus raised his hand but paused unsure what to do. He had seen that human thing done several times so why did he forget it now? Shepard raised her head to survey the gloved hand before looking to Garrus for an answer.
"I'm sorry, I.." The old nerves returned as he lowered his arm.
"What are you trying to do Garrus?" Shepard asked.
"That thing you humans do when you press your bodies to each other." Garrus replied having been put at ease again by the soft tone of Tanya's' voice.
"I'll show you but first, remove your glove."
Garrus was shocked at this request.
"Shepard, if I do that I could hurt you. A turian's talons are quite sharp."
"I trust you." She whispered.
Garrus hesitated for but a second before he disrobed his hand as Shepard gently took it in hers and pressed it to her face, snuggling it. His skin felt like soft, warm leather and the plates on the back of his hand felt like Keratin. Garrus tensed up as she pressed the hand to her face, splaying his finger under hers, his thumb talon below her eye. He knew that one small slip and he could hurt Shepard very badly. He wanted to whip his hand away but it was the fear of hurting her that stayed his hand. His three fingers almost encompassed the side of her head and there was a feeling of safety despite the fact that Garrus, talons lightly pressed into her skin. Shepard then dropped his hand and stepped forward and looped her arms loosely around his neck.
"Now, this is called a hug." She commented as she stepped forwards, placing her cheek on the tall turian's chest. The turian held his hands on Shepards side unsure of what followed next. A little discouraged that Garrus still hadn't got the hang of it yet, she moved his hands around her shoulders and lower back before returning her arms around his neck and gently squeezing him. Just then Garrus, who had been watching the whole thing play out in front of him with a child like fascination, got the hint and he gently squeezed her back, his fingers moving ever so slightly as they felt the strength but also the subtle yet calm curvature of her back. Tanya elicited a contented moan as she felt Garrus relax into his first hug. He lowered his head so her head fitted against his lower jaw and neck. Her hair felt soft to his bare skin and he couldn't help but wanting to touch it. He gently ran some through his fingers, marvelling at not only it's suppleness but it's strength as well. How could something so delicate be so strong? He was amazed by it as it broke into smaller bits from the clumps he ran through his fingers. Feeling each of the strands part and filter away through his fingers made him feel closer to the woman in front of him. There were so many delicate things about humans that he thought were flaws but proved to be just as strong as they were delicate. Garrus felt something rise up within him. Like a fire that had long burned within him finally went out and the weight that hung on his shoulders was finally lifted. He could get used to this hug thing he thought as he ignored her hair and concentrated on the hug, wanting to absorb as much of it as he could. Just as Garrus was enjoying the new experience, Shepard broke away, leaving the turian puzzled.
"Well, I guess I had better show you something we humans can do that turians find hard."
Garrus cocked his head in bewilderment.
"What is it you can do that I can't?" He asked somewhat sceptical.
Shepard just smiled.
"Trust me. You'll like it."
She stepped forward yet again and started to bring her mouth to his. Just then Mordin's warning of ingesting rang in his head, but curiosity and nerves held him rooted to the spot. He trusted Shepard and she wouldn't do this if she knew it was dangerous. Then he felt something soft and squishy slowly impact his mouth. His eyes shot open wide and he froze every muscle in his body was ridged as he felt a light pressure on his mouth. This feeling was nothing he had every experienced before. And then just like that, his body went lax and natural again. He wanted to returned what Shepard was doing but all he could do softly wiggle the two probes on top of his mouth. Shepard pulled back with a smile.
"We're you trying to copy me?" She asked, a smile on her face.
Garrus let loose an embarrassed chuckle. He tried to down play it but he really did try to kiss her back. It was an amazing feeling. He had never done anything like that with his mouth before. All these new experiences and the chance to start anew made him rethink what they were doing and he felt a little overwhelmed. He broke from Shepard and went with shaky legs to sit on the end of her bed.
Shepard watched with shock as he parted from her. Looks like it had become an awkward interspecies thing after all. She walked over to him and sat next to him.
"Garrus. I'm sorry if that was all strange to you. If your having second thoughts about this it's ok. I'm not pressuring you." Tanya soothed as she put a hand on his arm.
"No, it's not that." Garrus told her keeping his head down and away.
"Then what's wrong?"
She was greeted by silence.
"Garrus please. Tell me what's the matter."
Garrus swallowed.
"Shepard. So many things have gone wrong for me, and you're the only thing in this messed up universe that has gone right. You've shown me new experiences and feelings, but in a few scant hours that may all be taken away. I can't bare to think that something could potentially take this, take you, away from me. And I won't lie to you, but I'm having second thoughts about this mission." He paused as he took a breath. Shepard waited for him to finish as she had detected a twinge of doubt in his voice and it felt a little unsure. Garrus then turned his head to look up at her.
"I'm scared Shepard."
Tanya could see it in his face. He had found what he wanted all this time and now it was to be cruelly snatched from him. She held his head in her hands before gently pulling him to her where she cradled him. Garrus put his arms around her, wanting to hold on lest something happen to her.
"I'm scared too. Not only about losing you but that I maybe leading everyone to their demise. But as long as you're here, I have nothing to worry about."
That seemed to lift Garrus' spirits as he raised his head and his mandibles rose in what she could only take as a smile.
"And if we are to be taken then lets share this last night, together." Shepard comforted as she lay back, taking Garrus with her. This surprised the turian who gave out a yelp of surprise as he crashed onto the soft mattress. The human bed felt odd to the hard plated alien, it seemed to match the contours of his body unlike the heavy padding of the bunks they had on turian cruisers or the canvas fold-away's in the forward battery. It felt comforting and safe like it was cradling him. This again was a new concept to him as the bed mimicked the sleeper so soft beds were for those weaker and softer creatures as the popular dictation in some star systems said but humans proved that wrong, this bed was soft but Shepard was harder then Silaris armour. They lay on their sides looking into each others eyes before Garrus rolled on top of Tanya. She was surprised at the turian's weight as it pushed her into the mattress and at the warmth that emanated from his body but also at the gentleness he displayed. He supported most of his weight on his elbows and knees letting only a marginal amount rest on Shepard. He reached up a clawed paw and stroked her cheek backwards so his talons didn't rake her skin into red furrows. Garrus felt one hand fondle under his ridge. They both knew what feelings the other was thinking. But Shepard wanted to make sure.
"No regrets?" She asked.
"No regrets." He replied.
The Normandy approached the relay as EDI woke up Joker with a repetitive mechanical chime. Joker stirred and woke up, yawning and rubbing his eyes. He arched his back feeling it click and pop as he did so before settling back into the seat.
"Gateway in range Jeff." EDI responded in her flat, female voice.
"Better tell Shepard." Joker yawned, rotating his neck, driving the sleep away from his body.
"Comm. channel open."
Joker let loose one final yawn before coughing and speaking into the console in front of him. While EDI looked on.
"Shepard we're approaching the Omega 4 relay, twenty minutes out."
Shepard stirred as Jokers voice rang through the dark cabin. The time had come. What she had been anticipating but also dreading.
"Thanks Joker." She answered. "Lights dim." She called out and the darkness was banished by a faint light that gave the room a relaxed atmosphere as she sat up in bed, waking up and driving the sick feeling in her stomach to the farthest recesses of her mind. As her eyes slowly grew accustomed to the light she took a look round her cabin for maybe the last time. Her old N7 helmet sat on her desk, a reminder of her old life, the silvery orb on the ornate coffee table reflected the light back and pulsed intermittently, the model ships she had acquired on her journey stood frozen in a mini flotilla in the centre of the room. She cast her head to the right and smiled at the sleeping lump next to her and her dog tags on the bedside table. A relic of her old life behind the slumbering visage of the future. She gently pulled the eiderdown  off herself and swung her legs over the edge of the bed as she sat for a minute rubbing her eyes. She wore a light grey vest top, and black hot pants, her usual night attire. Her whole body had suddenly tensed up at the prospect of preparing for their doom and she felt mentally exhausted. She was about to embark toward the bathroom when she felt something warm yet rough touch her hand. Looking over her shoulder she saw that Garrus had stirred and was looking at her with sleep ridden eyes. She smiled back at him in return.
"Sorry if I woke you." She apologised.
"You didn't wake me. Joker did" was the bleary response.
"Well, for good reason as we're almost at the relay." Shepard uttered. "I'll give you a few more minutes then I'll see you in the briefing room." She made to stand when  the grip on her hand tightened.
"Can't you stay, just for those few minutes?" Garrus asked.
Tanya looked back at the turian and smiled. Truth be told she wanted an excuse to stall as well. She sat back down on the bed and she felt it shift under her as Garrus moved closer. Then she felt his hand slowly rest on her upper back and slowly stroke her shoulder blades. She leant back into his hand, feeling it play over her back, easing her tension and making her relax. His hand caressed her back in a slow and methodical, over her spine before it followed the contours of her shoulder blade before stroking her shoulder and back again. Garrus was enamoured by Shepard's slender back. It was so delicate and shapely that he wondered how such a beautiful creature could even fight the way she did. The cloth under his talons was soft and inviting to his touch but he wanted something more then fabric and softness. He wanted the real woman under it. He traced a thing line down the middle of Shepard's back with his talon which made Tanya shudder a little. His hands touched bare skin before ascending back up toward her shoulders but this time intruding under the fabric. He returned to his gentle caress of her back, feeling lines the softness and lines of her back perfectly now with the odd interruption of a rough scar that had long ago left it's mark on an otherwise flawless body. Shepard let him play with her back a little while longer before she stood up and grabbed her armour before making her way to the bathroom. Garrus lay there, trying to remember how she felt on his soft leathery hands but the feeling was fast disappearing like alcohol in one of Omegas cheap bars. This was probably the last sensation he would have but he wanted to keep it locked away where not even the cold, fingers of death could take it. As he concentrated on the sensations and what happened two hours previous he suddenly had a resurge of confidence. Shepard would get him out of this, she would get them all out of this. The bathroom door opened and a different Shepard stepped out. Not Shepard the woman, but Shepard the soldier.
"I'll grab something to eat then I'll call for everyone to assemble in the meeting." She told him, answering his unanswered question.. "I'll give you and the others a couple of last moments for yourselves."
And with that she turned for the door, new confidence soured through her. She would and could do this. She started to leave Garrus called to her and she cast a glance over her shoulder, the Kawashii visor covering her eye.
"No regrets?" Garrus asked.
Shepard just smiled at him.
"No regrets." She replied as she stepped through the door and onward toward her destiny.